Thursday, January 27, 2005

Grass is definitely NOT greener on this side!

Grass is definitely NOT greener on this side!

I know, I know... it's been awhile. I've been on strike ever since I realized just how much better Rachel's life was than mine. Needless to say, it's TONS better. I say this as Rachel is on a flight back from Sundance where she has been all week (can you tell my teeth were clenched the entire time that was said). Rach has been kind enough to call and text me with various updates over the week, which has been all the better to help me create in my minds eye a rather thorough step-chart graphing the suckiness of my day versus hers.

Example: Rach texts me "Hey, I'm waiting for Adrien Grenier right now, he's so great"... while at this particular moment I had just practically choked to death on my Big League Chew after watching a movie projectionist belt out "Dancing in the Streets" on American Idol. 1-0 Rachel. Example 2: Rachel calls to tell me that Paul Walker is indeed the best looking man on earth, while Jeremy Piven might just be the coolest. What was I doing at this particular moment... thanking my lucky stars that my Mother wasn't the woman on this weeks "My Super Sweet 16" and celebrating my out of this world victorious score of 542 on my personal handheld Yahtzee (it truly was spectacular) and trying to gloat about it to Momo over text. Nevertheless... bump, set... 2-nothing Rachel. Tonight is Rachel's birthday and is being thrown by a series of well known promoters and PR agencies (of course none of this can start until she has returned from Sundance and finished her interview with MTV). My last birthday was filled with strangers and I almost drowned in a "swamp water", only cause I couldn't afford the "trash can". Spike.

I could go on all day like this, but that would depress me, and anyways I have an urgent memo to attend to detailing the ulcer on my bosses fathers ass! Duty calls!

*Check Rach out in this past weeks Entertainment Weekly!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

At least you can take solace in the fact that you are much cooler than Rachel.

January 27, 2005 at 2:52 PM  
Blogger farsename said...

Handheld Yahtzee... now that is one hell of a game!!! I once got suspended from my job (for only 1 day) for playing it too much while on company time... but that high score keeps sucking you back in to try and top it, it is truly ridiculous, yet enlightening.

January 30, 2005 at 2:28 AM  
Blogger Kiki said...

It's out of control now... last night I scored an astonishing 632. I'm just about ready to start touring the pro-circuit. Someone needs to take that little machine away from me, pronto.

January 31, 2005 at 9:44 AM  

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